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My Battle with Breastfeeding

We used to fight every time it was time to nurse.

Baby E couldn’t latch on and would get so frustrated. If he did latch on somehow, it would be incorrect and would hurt me so bad. He was tearing away at my skin little by little. His shrilled cry would get louder and L O U D E R and I didn’t know what else to do. I was afraid that he was going to starve. FAIL. I knew there was no other option for me BUT to breastfeed. Not knowing how or what to do, I initially started to pump milk into bottles so

that at least I knew that he was eating. ( I used the

that I received from my sister-in-law. IT WAS A LIFE SAVER.) This also gave my body some time to heal. After a while, it became so tedious trying to keep up with the pumping with his unpredictable feeding schedule that I became so stressed out. I wasn’t eating or sleeping enough because whenever I had time, I would spend it pumping to prepare for his next feeding.

At this point, I was now ready to start breastfeeding again, however, Baby E had his own agenda. He had been so used to getting fed from the bottle that when I tried to nurse him, he would have a look of disdain and want nothing to do with it. Spitting out the nipple and would only stop crying once given the bottle. I was at an all time low. [I thought “He doesn’t like me, he doesn’t need me, he doesn’t want me”] I thought I would never breastfeed normally.

As that thought crept into my mind, It didn’t stay very long. There was no other option for him but to breastfeed. I thought of what Minister Farrakhan said in one of his lectures about how a baby comes out of the womb with nothing more than FAITH that his cry will bring his mother with food. Baby E kept looking for me for food and he had FAITH…Just a few days old and he had more faith than me at that moment. I knew I needed to have more FAITH in the God that he produced in me exactly what is needed for my son. . I just needed to figure out the way.

In my countless nights of research, I finally came across some other mothers who had very similar issues as I did and they used something called the ‘nipple shield‘ with their child. The nipple shield Medela Contact Nipple Shield, Medium

is a silicon nipple that you put over your nipple to protect it from incorrect latching, and it helps to promote proper latching for small infants. It has a small cut out for the baby’s nose so that he can smell his mother and get the skin to skin contact that is needed, however, it still has a tip like a bottle. (It was only about $5.00 on

He was finally eating from me!!

After about a week or so of him getting comfortable with the nipple shield, I was ready to start weaning him off. Every other feeding or in the middle of his feeding, I would remove the shield and he would latch on to me. Gradually, we stopped using the shield altogether. Now today, we successfully breastfeed without the use of any outside aids! I had and currently HAVE so much great support from my husband.

*To some this may see like no big deal but to me this was a great victory!


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