I asked my husband to share with us some insights into being a new father. Here are excerpts from our interview. Click the links to listen to the entire interview! Enjoy & Share with the other new or soon-to-be Dads you know!
1. How does it feel to be a Father?
“I was blessed to have a father growing up and the thing about being a father I think about him, my Dad, Brother Munir. I think about somebody who is a superhero. Whenever you need something, whenever you need somebody, he is there. Somebody that can
penetrate walls, somebody that nobody can ever beat up. Someone who is truly a protector or provider for his family. So, the father title is heavy. It’s kind of a reality that you must grow into. I can’t say I have fully grown into it because I have only had him for nearly 2 months. I am not sure when that reality comes in. You feel like a DAD right away, to me that feels like a general title, that is someone who has a child, but when you talk about a father when you talk about the magnitude of what a father was and is to you. It’s kind of hard to bring yourself to that reality right away. I can’t say exactly how it feels to be a father yet because I am trying to get there, someone who can inspire, someone who can push you to be great. I am striving to get him to hold his head up right now, that’s the level of fatherhood I am at…” [continue at How does it feel to be a new father? ]
Was there anything you didn’t expect?
“…And honestly, as a man, it’s our job to rise to the occasion regardless to what’s thrown at us. I can’t honestly say I expected any of it besides the baby coming out. That’s all I knew to expect. I didn’t really have any expectations that I knew were coming. But there was a whole lot I didn’t expect.
I didn’t expect to see my wife to reach that pinnacle of pain where she didn’t seem sad or as if she going to give up. She seemed ready and prepared to take on the next contraction.THAT, I wasn’t prepared for. I saw god in that moment. I was kind of worried about that moment that last couple moments where she would have to dig down and push. She totally derailed my fear and accomplished the ‘un-accomplishable’ from a man’s point of view.” [continue at Expectations ]
Are there any new lessons you learned that you can share with other New Dads?
You can’t base your experiences on anybody else’s because your wife is different and your child is going to be different. Which means that the only thing you can prepare for is your agility and your ability to rise to the occasion.
–Your wife’s happiness is the family’s happiness. In our finding of a woman, her job as a help meet is to help us meet our goals. The minister teaches us that a man who doesn’t have goals does not need a woman. If her job is to help you meet your goals then if you don’t have goals then you don’t need a woman, she can’t help you do nothing. She has to help you do something. Apart of our mission is to merge your goals with hers. You have to consider her passions and make sure her passions are met. So, if she likes to travel you have to figure it out how she can maintain her passions. Because you want to make sure your child is happy. [continue at New Lessons Learned ]
What are your hopes for your son?
I pray I can give my son the same type of experiences I had with my father. Where he sees his dad and admires what he does and take on a profession or a path that compliments what he does so that we can take the brand of the family business forward to create a mogul. I pray my son can take whatever I can build forward. I’ve learned a lot from my experiences and from my son, every day. [continue at Hopes for his future ]
Most traumatic memory so far?
When my wife was pushing, it seemed like the baby wasn’t going to come out! It has to end one way or another. And when the baby was coming out and was half way out, I couldn’t see how the progression was going. I had to relinquish all my faith to Allah/God. It’s hard to do that. It’s only him and your wife going through it. [continue at Most Traumatic ]
Best Moment so far?
My mom was holding Eisah one night and he was wilding out and crying, so I went to console him. I probably just got home from work and I went to go pick him up and he stops crying immediately, and my mom goes “I can’t believe this! I can’t believe he stopped crying. Do you know that man? Is that Dad.” I was like WOW, I held him and he really stopped crying. This is amazing. That taught me that someone recognized me as their father or consoler or an element that could bring ease. When I held him, I gave him what I had gotten from my parents and it was amazing to see that and experience that for him to look at me like “ I needed you, son” Praise Be to Allah. That was a beautiful moment. [continue at Best Moment ]
**If you want to watch the Interview in entirety click here ! **
-Medinah